A state of mind and a way of life

I feel like I need to clarify something before telling you all about my recent happenings here in the Badia. I know may of you who read this like to see crazy pictures and hear stories about how different life is here in Jordan, but I don't want to minimize my experiences and the lifestyles of those around me by relegating them to novelty. Even though there are some key differences in lifestyles between the people here and all my friends in America, there are more similarities than differences. Most of the comments that people have left so far have mentioned the lack of western style plumbing, eating without utensils, or various other insignificant differences that I did not mean to highlight. I just hope that people are getting the real point when reading this blog as I wouldn't want to show anything but deep respect and admiration for the style of life here. Please don't see this as some crazy adventure I am on to see how strange the culture is, but rather try to see it with my eyes. After a few weeks the differences fade and only the similarities remain. I am learning so much about not only the culture here but human nature in general. All people have the amazing ability to love as well as hate. I've learned here that to love is to know rather than to know is to love. I suppose the inverse would be true that to hate is to not know or not understand, but I believe that what motivates the understanding or lack of understanding is the ability to love. The language barrier I face keeps me from knowing details about people like Abu Alaa and his family, or keeps me from knowing the struggles that all my friends here face day to day. This lack of knowledge has not kept me from loving them but rather showed me that you don't have to know someone to love them. I have however seen that as soon as you choose to love someone then you really begin to know them. Given my religious beliefs this makes sense as we are taught only two laws... Love thy God with all thy heart, and love thy neighbor as thyself. To know anything then is it necessary to have love? These have been a few of my thoughts recently.

The style of life here is simple yet complex. It emphasizes similar priorities but from a different standpoint. God, family, and country are just as important here as they are in the States, but the importance of duty to that God, family, and country over the importance of individualism is paramount here. I come from a culture that values the individual over the family, and personal drives and desires over cultural expectations. I have seen that there are benefits to both ways of thinking but I can also see how there would be issues where the methodologies would collide. Many of my friends here would like to do other things with their lives in terms of careers etc, but what is most important is the obligation they have to their family. The clash of western individualism and this obligation is evident but then again maybe this clash of individualism against obligation is nothing new. I think similar conflicts exist in the States, but the American culture is much more permissive to exploration and less is expected of children as it pertains to obligation to the family. There are many situations where the choice to stay and help the family seems second nature and no conflict arises. This has been most evident to me as I have spoken with Alaa and Noor, two young men in their early 20's that despite being well educated and working hard in school are dedicated to returning to continue their father's work in helping the Badia develop. I asked why they wanted to do this and they acted as if they had never considered an alternative as that wouldn't make sense. After pressing the subject further I saw that Abu Alaa had done a masterful job teaching his children what was really important as both Alaa and Noor did not want to spend their lives chasing a career, or financial success, but rather wanted to spend their time helping the people here like their father. I think the best lesson Abu Alaa has provided his sons is a life of service and sacrifice to others. I hope that I can provide my sons with that kind of lesson as well someday.
This brings up an interesting point about how to spend your life. I always have been interested about what people find important and where people find their happiness. Having studied some economics in school I like to relegate things to utility and the activities that provide that utility. When I was talking about various ideas and pursuits in life such as school and work etc, I was told a story (I believe it is an old Islamic parable) that made me think, so I will share it with all of you.

A man was walking through the desert when he came across a large hungry lion. Being alone and without the means of defending himself the man began to run but the lion chased him. The man came across an abandoned well as he was running for his life so he decided to climb down the rope to escape the lion. As he was climbing down the rope he saw at the bottom of the abandoned well a large poisonous snake. The man had quite a predicament as he was stuck hanging from a rope with a hungry lion at the top of the well and a poisonous snake at the bottom. After a moment a small white mouse appeared and began to nibble at the rope, followed by a small black mouse. The white mouse and black mouse took turns nibbling on the rope so the man became concerned about his predicament as he knew it was just a matter of time before the rope broke. The rope was quite thick however and it would take a very long time for the mice to chew through the rope so the man thought he would have some time to figure out a solution to his problem. After a while the man became very hungry and was fatigued from his hunger, he was worried that he would not be able to hold on to the rope if he didn't find something to eat soon. At that moment he saw some bees there flying from a hole in the side of the well so the man made his way toward the hole and saw there was some honey there in the hole where the bees had made their nest. The man figured he would be fine for a while to sit and eat honey and think about how to solve his predicament. So there the man sat digging for honey and thinking about his problem while the mice slowly nibbled at the rope. It was a thick rope though and the man figured he has lots of time to worry about his problem so for the time being his hunger was more important. Eventually the man spent more time digging for the honey and less time thinking about his problem until he was completely involved with digging into the hole and eating the delicious honey. The man forgot all about the lion and the mice and the snake but was completely focused on getting more honey to satisfy his hunger. This went on until the rope finally broke and he fell down and was killed by the snake.

We are all in the well and we are all having our ropes slowly nibbled away by the white mouse of the day and the black mouse of the night. We all need to find honey to sustain ourselves, but are we forgetting the real problem at hand? I think we all have things in our lives that distract us from that problem but realizing their real importance is difficult. Paul Brockbank used to say the opposite of the best is the good. It's good to eat honey and sustain ourselves but what is the best use of our time? I suppose that is one of the most important lessons I'm learning here is what is truly important... I would love to get some feedback from all of you about the various types of honey in your lives and what you find truly important.

I send you my love from the Badia.

Loren of Arabia

Redneck is Universal!

So I'll paint you a picture...

So my I'm hanging out with some friends talking about life and women, enjoying the sunshine and the outdoors. We talk about going camping and how much we love fishing. We complain about how city life is too crowded and a man needs space to really breathe and grow. We talk about how annoying it is when someone from the city thinks they are better than you. One friend suggests we go shooting as he's got some old televisions that would be fun to shoot at. We mess around with some horses and then get the idea of going and driving some tractors. We all have a blast moving some gravel with a big Caterpillar front loader. It's getting late so we stop by my to say hi to my friend's parent's and they insist we stay for dinner. We try to refuse but try telling some good country folk that you don't want to eat... not happening! So we eat and then head home as we all have to be up at the crack of dawn to do chores and help out around the family farm. I offer to make some dinner the next night so we all get together and whip up some good ol' country spaghetti and of course everyone douses it with hot sauce like any good redneck would. We talk about the price of feed and how gas prices are killing agriculture. One of my friends talks about being in the Army and how that is probably the best way to get educated when you're from the country. We hang out and listen to some Skynard and talk about how our parents are ragging us to get married. We all think family is important but we want to have some time to ourselves first (at least that's what we say till we find some girl who we can't pass up I'm sure). We talk about how love of God, family, and country and are comfortable with our simple lifestyle without the flash of big city living. We watch a few movies and listen to some Willie Nelson and call it a night.

Sounds like another great weekend in Texas right?

The real catch is it's in Jordan way out in the Badia.

I'm convinced that the Bedouin here would get along famously with American Rednecks if they were able to get to know one another. I laugh as everyone talks to me and says that I'm not like the other American volunteers they see. They say I'm actually friendly, down to earth, and approachable unlike the peace corps volunteers they meet. I say they need to meet more Texans as that's just southern hospitality. Granted there are a couple hangups that Rednecks might have out here and being accepting of differences isn't a real Redneck strength, but I really think that being a good 'ol boy is universal and we're all more similar than different.
I have spent some time explaining the meaning of the term Redneck and how it's used as an insult in the cities but a source of pride in the country and they say that's exactly how the term Bedouin is used here. In the cities it means simple minded and uneducated, but to them it means strong families and a love of God and country.

Too bad Rednecks don't like Bedouin and Bedouin don't like Rednecks... or maybe it's good because as long as they hate each other then they can't take over the world.

Maybe I'm way off on this one but hey... I thought it was pretty funny!

Another great week!

So I have had a great week here in the Badia.

It started off incredibly cold and windy so pre-school was canceled and as such I didn't have any classes to teach but as it warmed up the next few days I had the chance to hang out and teach the 5 year old kids English. The kids are all adorable and I love playing around teaching them different words and playing games. This week we learned about colors, big and small things, and body parts. I taught them the head shoulders knees and toes song and the other teachers thought I was crazy for singing along with the kids but they all had a blast. On Thursdays and Saturdays I work with the high school kids on their English and they are fun to hang out with as well. Really the big need here is help with the English language as that is the real key to education. Unfortunately my Arabic is probably suffering as everyone wants to speak English with me and get practice with a native speaker but if it means I get to help people here then that's ok. I have met an English teacher here named Shlash and have asked him to work with me a few times a week on my Arabic so I think that will help out and get me proficient faster.

A little about Shlash, he is quite the character as he is very straightforward and is quick to speak his mind. I like this as it gives me a unique perspective and a good understanding of how things really are here. We have talked a lot and I think we have learned a lot from each other. Even better than just talking he took me to his family's farm the other day and showed me how to drive a massive Caterpillar front loader, ride a camel, herd and count sheep, and all sorts of other fun stuff. He showed me the bayt shaher or the tent next to his father's house that's used in Bedouin ceremonies like weddings etc. Shlash is getting married in 20 days so he is letting me come to the wedding and I'm really excited about seeing all of that.

I'm starting to make actual friends here and get comfortable in my environment. When you're brand new in places everyone is nice just because you're new but after a while you sift through and find some really neat people that you'd probably be friends with regardless of that fact that you're a visitor in their country. I've enjoyed getting to know Abu Alaa, his sons Alaa and Noor, the English teacher Shlash, Riyad over at the Ministry of Education. These people are beginning to be really good friends and have taught me so much about life and so if for no other reason I'm glad I was able to come out here to meet some pretty fantastic people like that.

I'm still talking to people about different opportunities for economic development and helping people put together proposals for various grants and development initiatives. Being a fluent English speaker is apparently quite advantageous here and has provided me with some unique opportunities. I have been approached by an individual who imports energy efficient light bulbs and I've been impressed to see the margins in light bulbs and other green technology like hybrid cars (the government does not tax these types of imports). Maybe there is a future for me in importing... we shall see. Opportunities seem to be coming out of the woodwork here so I'm interested in seeing what pans out here over the next few months but in the meantime my main focus is seeing what I can do to help the society I'm working with. The North Badia Development Cooperation Society is doing a lot of good out here educating the people, providing them the means to work and support themselves, and helping them build homes. I'm hoping to get some more support in the form of fluent English speaking volunteers to come out here and spend some time helping out so if anyone who is reading this wants to come out or knows of anyone who wants to come spend some time and have one of the most amazing experiences ever please do let me know.

The weather is warm, I've finally mastered the no toilet thing, I'm losing a ton of weight due to the lack of fast food here, I'm having fun with the kids, I'm making good friends, and I'm learning a TON about all sorts of things. Life is good in the Badia.

So much to say...

Sorry for the lack of posting, it has taken me this long to get internet access here in the Badia.

So I must say there could be no way to prepare for my experience thus far. I'm living in a small village called Salhiyya about 40km from Mafraq on the road towards Baghdad. I live in a small complex of about 24 apartments that are offered to the Bedouin people to give them a place to stay to save money to build a house so they can move out of their tents. It's kind of funny though even when people build a big extravagant house as a status symbol they still have their tent set up next to it and spend most of their time there. The organization I'm working with (primarily, as I'm working with many different organizations on many different projects) is involved with financing the Bedouin people in buying land as right now the Jordanian government is willing to pay for the building of a house if you have the land to build it on. The problem is that most people don't have any land that they own so Abu Ala, the head of this complex and apparently a very respected man in the area, is offering to sell portions of his own land on credit to the people so they can take advantage of this program while it is available. This project along with helping come up with funding for other types of Badia development projects such as building shops to employ the poor Bedouin and schools to educate their children are my primary focus here. I'll be teaching a pre-school in the mornings and high schoolers two nights a week starting tomorrow so that should be fun as well. Native English speakers are such a rarity here so I'm told the most valuable thing I can do to help out here is teach English. Apparently all the University level courses taught here in Jordan (and anywhere in the Middle East) are taught in English so everyone studies it from the first grade on, but there are so few native speakers out here even the most qualified teachers still struggle to convey fluency. So we will see where my efforts are best served.

The culture here is amazing, everyone is incredibly nice and welcoming. Although my Arabic is mostly useless thus far (as it is MSA and they speak a different dialect here) many people study and want to speak English so it hasn't been TOO big a problem. I have spent the last week hanging out at the Ministry of Education for the Northern Badia making friends with many of the administrators and talking to the locals. I can't cross the street without getting a dinner invitation or an offer for a ride. In Jordan (and I'm told many other Middle Eastern countries) everyone has a large sitting room where the men come and hang out and drink tea or coffee (there is a whole ceremony surrounding the serving of Arabic coffee which I will explain later) and smoke. People invite you in and demand that you drink something and hang out and usually after an hour or two food is served Bedouin style. Everyone sits around a large communal plate of rice and maybe if you're really really lucky some meat, and some yogurt on the side to mix with the rice. Sometimes you eat with a spoon and sometimes with your hand but all conversation stops and everyone eats for a bit then goes and sits back down against the wall to relax for a bit before more coffee and tea is served. The oldest son usually does all the serving and it's very formal yet friendly. Depending on the home you might watch some TV or just hang out and talk. Most of the people love American movies, though the movies that are popular out here are quite different than the ones popular in the States. The ones that everyone watches out here are not necessarily less violent or sexual in nature but just different. For instance everyone knows Owen Wilson from the movie I Spy rather than anything else he's done. So eventually it gets late and I try to leave but it takes three or four tries to convince my host that I really must go which I'm told is pretty standard practice in the Arabic world. Rarely will I meet the women in the family but on occasion I will be considered family and I will meet the wives or daughters of the people I see. Abu Ala has adopted me into his family and I got to meet his wife and daughters on one occasion and it was a real sign of love and respect. A woman I did have a conversation with did her best to dispel the idea that she is of a lower class than men but instead was revered and respected and protected from the unrefined behavior of men. It's just all very different here I guess and the separation is a part of that. One thing you can never escape is the conversations about politics. Everyone wants to talk about American involvement in Iraq, or the horrors of the Israeli actions against Palestinians and it's very interesting to get that perspective. I usually just nod my head and let people vent and try to learn what I can about the situation. I'm not well versed enough to get into a deep political discussion nor would I want to here. Everyone is very nice about it though and reminds me that they love the American people even if they don't like the actions or behaviors of the American government. I'm not going to get too political with this blog but only report what I see and hear but I will say that what we see and hear in the American news is probably more biased toward Israel than anything else.

I have made good friends with a man named Riyad who works at the Ministry of Education, he and Tariq and Abdullah all help me with my Arabic during the day and teach me a lot about the culture. The people here are incredibly poor here in the Badia and even the most well off people live on less than 400-600 dollars a month. The children play soccer in a dirt patch that they have cleared of big rocks and people have nothing here. It's interesting to sit in a tent around a fire to stay warm but see cable television with 2000 channels. There is no such thing as central heating and everyone survives on propane or kerosene space heaters. It's pretty chilly here and you always have your jacket on inside or out. There is no such thing as a toilet and I'm still figuring out what everyone does for toilet paper as I have yet to find any (fortunately I brought some from Mafraq the local city). I live with an environmental science teacher from Japan named Sei and he is hilarious. He speaks ok English and some Arabic so he helps me get around and know where everything is. He's been here for 6 months and will be here for another year and a half. He is fun to talk to and get to know so I'm glad I have my Japanese tree hugger friend here to keep me company.

I am overwhelmed by the love and welcoming spirit I've been shown here by everyone I encounter. I have to admit that I'm kind of ashamed sometimes as I know that these people would not be shown the same kindness and love if they were to show up in America. I was warned to be careful and told to be safe before coming here but I will admit that I feel safer here just miles from Syria and hours from Iraq than I would feel in many places in the US. There is a huge misunderstanding between American culture and Arab culture and I am beginning to think it's not them that have the faulty information. These people don't hate Americans or America. These people aren't out to kill infidels. These people have more Christlike love than I have seen in most places I have lived and I wish I could tell them that we as Americans would be as open and accepting to them as they have been to me... but I fear it would be a lie. I will say that I'm truly impressed by the culture here. It is a culture of love and hope, one of kindness and sharing despite incredible poverty. I still have much to learn but everything I have experienced so far has been amazing (except the no toilet thing of course).